This is once again, a bit of a morning post. I couldn’t quite say what I wanted to say last night when I tried to write this entry. I suppose we’d gotten back from the gym a little bit late and I had woken up a bit early, but for whatever reason, the words just weren’t coming quite in the way that I wanted them too. Nonetheless, waking up, and putting on some coffee while watching a hell of a storm outside seems to have jogged my brain.
I mentioned on Tuesday that you would be getting a real blog post today. None of that, “I put a few things in here and there and it was mostly just the fixing of awkward phrasing,” stuff. So today I’m going to talk a bit about a scene I’ve been working on without giving away too much of the story. Alright, well, this is really the one big fix that I have to make from this pass through of Dreamstate II. There are a couple other smaller scenes that I’m making changes in, but it’s nothing quite like this. The reason this particular bit of the story is so large is that it acts as a bit of a turning point for Daniel’s general demeanor. The way that I have had the scene, in the older versions, is one in which Daniel is pretty detached. He’s been doing through some stuff, weight of the world on his shoulders (gods need slaying and all that), and it’s tough with him to cope, especially with just normal teenage stuff. The thing is, is that I think I took it a bit far. It’s not only that Daniel becomes detached from his responsibilities to draw back into his own business, it’s that he’s fully vanishing. He is blowing off everyone and everything around him. His parents, friends, people in every world—he was gone. This also made his interactions with them super transient; there was no substance to anything except what he was personally focused on.
Don’t get me wrong, I was trying, to some degree to get that effect. I wanted the readers to really feel how Daniel felt about all the stuff that was going on, and it worked, sort of. One of the big issues, though, was that my readers, myself included, ended up not liking Daniel. He was a bit of an ass to everyone whom got in his way. The boy had completely detached himself from the world and was pretty much on the edge of total chaos. I did not want this.
I think the issues really stemmed from me having trouble, while writing, in pulling back and seeing the full evolution of Daniel from the first to last page. It was hard for me to see completely how much he’d changed and how rapidly until I sat down with the full book to check it out. He’s now been reigned in significantly, and that large scene I’m working on is really one of the last stands of him acting like a jerk. I need to fill it out, have him interact on a meaningful level with a couple people involved, and just generally act like a human being with human emotions for a bit. It doesn’t need to be crazy—it should be obvious he’s bothered by other stuff, but I don’t want him to lose it completely; people still need to be able to connect with him.
Bit of a thing, but I think I’m coming out on top.